I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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