You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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