My friends, they love my intelligence
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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