end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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