i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
