Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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