Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize
