You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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