Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
How does one acquire holy water?
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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