He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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