how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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