We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
