doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
