i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Randomize
