Can Purell be used as lube?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
