PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
