Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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