She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
