he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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