i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
