I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
