they need to just BURY HIM!
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
this just has baby written all over it
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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