Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
