At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
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