Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
