there was a trapeze. enough said
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
