You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
