Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Please don't give away my fajitas
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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