garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
