the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
