Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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