he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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