names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
