I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
