I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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