There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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