I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
