mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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