he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
i out mim tonsoeep
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
