RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
