Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
How does one acquire holy water?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
