i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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