About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
