The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
