I think my vagina is haunted
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
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