May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize
