i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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