Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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