i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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