wakey wakey hands off snakey
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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